Monthly Archives: March 2013

Reprieve?

I kept waiting for the call that said it was all a mistake.  I knew deep down that it was not going to happen.  But maybe it will be like the movies and I would get a last minute reprieve…  I wrote this when I first started the blog and didn’t finish it.  Below is the rest.

As we all know, that was not the case.  The script was not written with a last minute reprieve.  Or was it?  A “reprieve”, in it’s noun form, is a cancellation or postponement of a punishment.   While I in no way think my cancer diagnosis is any sort of punishment, maybe it is some sort of a cancellation.

I am cancelling a life of cancer for a life free of cancer.  I don’t even want to think about the ramifications if the diagnosis had been made any later than it was.  I am cancelling aspects of my life that need to be changed in order to deal with an ever changing life script.  Dealing with the ever changing script of my life is a huge learning process.

I am learning that not having control over every aspect of your life is, at times, overwhelming.

I am learning how to ask for help without feeling like a bother, or high maintenance, or a pain in the neck, or a whiner, or whimpy.  I could go on and on but I think you get the point.

I am learning that too much internet searching is not productive, mentally or emotionally.

I am learning that I am my own best advocate.

I am learning that I am so lucky to have access to such outstanding medical care.

I am learning how truly and deeply loved I am from my community, friends and family.

So I think that a reprieve was written into the script of my life.  I think the script will again be rewritten and the reprieve will be replaced by permanent life changes, life changes learned from my reprieve.

Fun Videos

Along with the jokes, I have been sent some very funny videos.  This is one of my favorites and so apropro.

Canadians have the best breast self exam videos ever!
http://youtu.be/QA2uPxYeXGU

This is Gym Etiquette by Jimmy Tatro.  Warning the language might be offensive to some.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YByfi1ENOiI

Paper is not dead.

Enjoy!

Whistler Bound!

We are headed to Whistler for five days of relaxation!  A good friend and client has offered her condo to me for years.  This was the first time we were able to take advantage of such a great offer.  Fiona is home for Spring Break and this was a vacation we planned BD (before diagnosis.)  Scott and Fiona will snowboard while I do my best to rest up for the onslaught of chemo.

Speaking of chemo, the first round of AC is only four cycles given every other week.  I originally thought it was six cycles.  The AC will still be followed by 12 cycles of T given once a week.  Meaning that my November 13 tentative end date is moved up to October 16!

Our 30th wedding anniversary is October 15.  I think finishing up cancer treatment says “I love you” better than any pearl or diamond could! (Of course diamonds are really pretty….)

The Plan – Vanna can I have an “A” a “C” and a “T”?

Today was the day to get “The Plan.”  Scott and I met with the oncologist today.  I will start off by saying he is a super nice guy.  I feel very confident with the care I am receiving from him.  I will have two rounds of chemo.  They will run consecutively.  The drugs are called AC and T.  See the following:

AC + Taxol / Taxotere – AC is one of the five most common types of chemotherapy given to women with breast cancer. It includes two drugs: doxorubicin (Adriamycin), and cyclophosphamide (Cytoxan). Paclitaxel (Taxol) or docetaxel (Taxotere) is added to AC for women with node-positive cancer, or in women who’ve had a recurrence; it’s delivered after you’ve finished the AC.

I will start with the AC next Friday.  This will be an infusion every other Friday for 6 rounds or 12 weeks.  The major side effects of this drug are nausea, low white cell counts and hair loss.  To combat two of these side effects I will get anti nausea drugs and a white cell booster.  The hair loss has no counter.  I will lose my hair.  Generally a person will feel the worst of the side effects about 7-8 days after an infusion.  This can last a few days.  You then feel better to start it all over.

As soon as the AC is complete, the T begins.  This round does not have as severe side effects as the AC.  It is an infusion once a week for 12 weeks. One of the major side effects is tingling fingertips.  There are ways to counter this side effect also.

That brings me to one of the biggest side effects of all.  Instant menopause!  Instead of lasting 4-5 years, it will happen in a flash (no pun intended.)  Apparently there are also ways to combat these side effects.

By my calculations, I will be finished with chemo on August 23!  I will have a week or two to recover and then the final margin surgery.  After another 2 weeks or so I will start radiation. Radiation will be 33 sessions.  That translates to every day, M-F for 6.5 weeks.  I am hoping it will all be done by Nov 13!!!

So, there you have it, “The Plan.”  There will be some rough periods. But, the bottom line of all of this is, and I quote the oncologist, is that when this is all done “You will be okay.”

Hi all!

Hi all!

Just thought I would write a bit about today.  I know some of you are very upset about the additional surgery.  But, it was always a possibility because the margins did not meet the acceptable minimum.  I would rather have more taken than not enough.  I will have the surgery a few weeks after I finish chemo and before I start radiation.

Having the scans themselves were ok.  We don’t have the results yet.  I had an IV that was used to inject the radioactive tracer used in the bone scan.  They also used the IV to inject the contrast for the CAT scan.  (I still consider myself more of a dog person,)  I did have to drink a liter of mostly water stuff.  It really tasted like water.  Since I was not able to eat or drink for a while, it all went down just fine.  I did have to pee a million times (maybe that was TMI?)  The weird thing about it all is that I am radioactive for the next 48 hours.  I have a piece of paper to carry around with me in case I set off alarms or whatever.

Thank you all so very much for your comments!  While I haven’t answered them I have read and love each and every one.

But wait, there’s more….

We had a nice chat with the surgeon.  She explained the pathology report from all the stuff they took out during the surgery.  It was all the same stuff that she had explained to Loretta over the phone.  The new part was that they had had a conference (“they” are all the doctors of various specialties) and they decided that some more needed to come out.  Yeah haw!  More surgery.  The best part of this otherwise bad news is that it will be after she is allowed to recover from the chemo – whenever that is.  This one should also be much less invasive and not involve a drain, etc.

Then there is the weird thing going on with her skin (see Vanna, I’d like to buy a vowel).  The surgeon, being a specialist in cancer, was concerned that maybe it was cancer exhibiting itself in very strange ways.  It is very unlikely, but, since the cancer was found in the skin, it concerned her.  Enough that she wanted some.  So, using the most expensive hole punch known to man, she got another piece of Loretta and sent it off to the lab.  We should have results from that tomorrow or Wednesday.

Next are the scans (bone and cat) with results for those ready on Wednesday when we meet with the oncologist.